Hello!

Do you want more money?  I'm betting you do just like the rest of us!  I want to share a strategy , that helped me to become debt free in less than 4 years, of when I decided being debt free was a priority.  It's so simple you'll say duh!  But a lot of people discount how effective it is.

So you have your debt or specific goal.  You pick only one to focus on until that debt is paid off or that goal amount is reached.  Ie:  You have 3 credit cards, a car payment and your mortgage.  Pick one credit card to focus on.  OR you have a couple big things you want.  You want to buy a house, go on a vacation to Rome and you want to buy a big ticket item for your home.  Pick one.

Then for the goal create a seperate account only for that particular item, or store the cash in an envelope only designated to that item, and nothing else.  Discipline is required for this to work.

Then look at the things you typically do.  Do you go out to eat a lot?  Do you buy coffee every day?  Is your grocery bill always really high, and you're not sure what you spend it on?  Maybe you spend a lot on Uber or transportation?  Shopaholics anyone?  Daily drinks at a bar?  Maybe you typically get a large bonus once or twice a year that you have already spent...

Step 1: Determine what you do frequently.

Step 2:  Commit to whenever you would normally do that thing, you take that amount of money and pay it towards your credit card or transfer the money to that specific goal account.

*Side note* This is on top of paying your monthly minimums that you were already paying.  And if its a credit card and because you have paid off so much your minimums are lower, you still pay the amount that you were paying before. 

For example you have been paying $200 minimums on your credit card for a while now, but because you've been so disciplined after you heard about this strategy that now your minimum payments have been reduce to $100, you keep paying $200.

Lets use Uber as the example.  Say you live in a big city and take Uber a lot, its cold, and it saves you so much time rather than taking the bus, or you run late a lot and so now you have to take Uber to get to work on time.  Sound familiar?  I know I have done this, and I know there are plenty of you that do this too.  Every ride is somewhere between $6-$30 average.  If you're in New York I know it can be A LOT more that that.

Average out how often you take Uber per day, and how much is each ride usually?  If you take Uber 1-3 times a day and its usually $6-$15, then every single time you opt to take the bus, walk, or share a ride with a friend, you make a payment of $6-$15 to the credit card that you committed to paying off.  So yes, that does mean that some days you might make three separate $6 payments to the same credit card.  One might say why now wait until the end of the day and pay $18?  You could.  But most people aren't that disciplined.  And if you are committed to this new practice, it will become sort of like a game.  Often you will end up choosing to take the bus or walk so that you "get to" lower your credit card balance by $6.  If you wait until the end of the day this strategy loses its potency; and more than likely you'll forget at the end of the day.

You can even do this with several things.  For example every time I choose to buy a drip coffee instead of a late, if I choose not to drink, and I went shopping with my friends, and there was this gorgeous dress I really wanted.  But I resisted.  Look at the price tag of that dress and make that payment, when you get in the car and drive away.  Make that $2 payment that you saved because of choosing to buy a drip coffee instead of a late.  And if you decide not to drink that night when you're at the bar getting dinner, make that $7 payment to your credit card when you are paying the check.

If your grocery bill or any other bill is very high of you are able to reduce it, you take the difference of what you were going to / or normally pay, and use that amount to pay your credit card.  For example your grocery bill is normally $400, on the times you go to the grocery store and you only spent $100 (what??!!) then you make a $300 payment towards that credit card.

If you make more money than the average bear, or are in commissions work.  You can apply this same principal to your bonuses.  But in this case, you will have to change your point of view on these bonuses.  Look at the word: bonus = something extra... something you were not going to get otherwise.  So you take that large amount and put it towards paying off debt or saving for a big ticket item.  IF, before reading this article you used to spend the money you knew you were going to get, then use the bonus to pay that off, there will be an adjustment period.  If you were use to spending the bonus to pay off things you already bought, knowing the money would come.  One idea is to take as much of that bonus as you can and put it into an account and sit on it for as long as you can.  Then the next bonus will be to pay for things you want.  Doing this will change your habits over time.

This method is exactly how I paid off my brand new car two years early.  And how I paid off very big student loans a couple years earlier than I had calculated.  And still use this method to save.

I know it sounds trivial because the amounts are so small, and it seems ridiculous to make so many payments throughout the month.  But this method works.  Plus the trick is not to cut yourself off from the things that you want.  Just simply notice the times that you choose not to indulge, or maybe commit to cutting back once a week, then replace that typical purchase with a payment towards your financial freedom. By implementing this strategy you do not feel deprived, and you will actually feel excited to walk instead of take Uber, or cook at home for your friends instead of going out to eat.

*Note* In order to become debt free, once you pay off one credit card, you move on to the next.  Applying this principle + the original minimum payment you were making when it was high ($200 from the example above).  

Try this method for three months and I know this will be a new way of living for you.  Let me know what ended up happening for you!

​Much prosperity, Jessica

Hello!

Often when we start on our own intentional emotional evolution journey we hit road blocks.  These road blocks keep us stuck for days, make our old addictions look VERY attractive, and sometimes compel us to quit the intentional evolution journey and go back to the very thing/situation that may have been harming us in the first place.

Although it feels like it in the moment, you are not alone.

When we come up to a feeling or a reaction about a situation that we "are not supposed to" think or feel or feel embarrassed to feel that way; this can often cause us to do a variety of destructive habits, even if we don't tell anyone about our feelings.  We all come up against these feelings we are embarrassed to be feeling at some point in our lives, probably more often than we would like.  This, if you reduce it down to its most basic state is shame.  Brene Brown does FANTASITC work on the subject of shame.  And has been a big influence on me.

Personally I believe that these feelings of shame, or if you don't want how to feel to be true, compels all kinds of very destructive behaviors, including lying, stealing, gas lighting, manipulation, self isolation, depression, health problems, addictions...  An unaware person may go through any length of things to convince one self of how they feel or "make those feelings go away."

I know I have gone through this myself, I know these uncomfortable feeling will come up again in my own life; AND I have witnessed/gone through this with clients.  As you get closer and closer to your core stuff this will likely show up more and more.

Its really challenging to process feelings that you don't actually want to feel.  Whether it is jealousy of someone that one one level your are truly happy for, and then those jealous feelings poke their head up in surprise.  Or confusion; someone that you love, and on one level you know they love you; and yet on another level you start to see their self serving manipulation; or become aware of how they are hurting you even though they say they love you, and you do believe that they love you.  And one of the worst spiral traps is depression; because in this society you're supposed to  be happy or grateful.  Its really hard to process and unfortunately hard to talk about with people.  For this reason therapists and coaches are a wonderful resource.  But even if you are fortunate enough to have someone that you are able to share your "real" feelings with, its still hard to be present with; to not make it go away.

When these kinds of feelings do show up, this a massive opportunity for integration.  For bringing one aspect of your self in, to become more whole, that was previously rejected so that you could assimilate to your circle.

While it can be extremely uncomfortable, get rid of the idea that "you're not supposed to" feel those feelings.  They are showing up, and there is something important in that, so allow it to come up, even if it forces you to change your plans for the day, maybe even longer.  Or tell that aspect that you will come back to it later, and then do that.  

Ultimately I want you to know that you are not wrong or stupid or immature for feeling the uncomfortable feelings that many of us don't like to feel.  Like jealousy, rage, anger, depression, sadness, insecurity...  If you do have someone that you feel safe enough with to talk to them about these feelings, sharing what you are experiencing is the most powerful thing that you can do to integrate.  But if you do not have people you feel safe with don't tell them, but find someone that you do feel safe enough with.  You can also write, talk out loud in your home, car, or in nature with nobody around, tell an animal like your dog, find a therapist, meditate....  While its incredibly healthy to be seen, heard & understood - no matter what is going on, it is not healthy to find people that will agree with how you are right and "they" are wrong.  This is not about demonizing the other person.  While that will make you feel better in the moment, it will also push those emotions down only to resurface in a more catastrophic way later on.  This is making your pain bigger.  Its important to take away the stigma of the uncomfortable feelings so that you can process it, and grow.

Feeling embarrassed or ashamed of how you feel blocks our evolution.  It blocks our greatest desires.  When these uncomfortable feelings come up, I want you to know you are not wrong for feeling that way.   The way to integration, and ultimately having/ achieving/ experiencing everything we truly want comes from being present and going though the really difficult emotions, not avoiding or covering them up.

I hope this gives you courage to be present with your emotions, especially the uncomfortable ones, even if you don't tell anyone. 

Sending love, Jessica

Have you ever noticed that the people that seem so positive seem to often have things go their way?  Or the opposite do you have any extremely negative people that seem to just get beaten by life?

Of course these are two opposite ends of the spectrum.  But have you ever noticed their words and how they speak?  I bet you if you compared these two people, the way they speak is quite different.  In the US alone we have so many common sayings.

Break a leg
The rich get richer and the poor get poorer
Every penny counts
I can't take it anymore/I'm about to explode
Why me?
Of course! This always happens to me!
The only thing guaranteed in life is death and taxes
Last chance! Liquidation sale!
Should...
I always...
I never...
Speaking in a double negative to take the sting off

The list can go on and on.  But this is a wonderful example of common sayings that many american's say.  Not to mention their own pattern of speaking.  Most of us don't realize how powerful
 our language is.  Thus we never take the time to examine the words we are saying, and how it might contribute to our perception and experience of life.

I encourage you to pay attention to the words you say.  Think about them, are they on the negative or positive side?  Its true, many people will say words or phrases that are negative but mean something positive.  The classics that come to mind are: 
"break a leg" = "Good luck!" or
"you're not so bad" = "we really adore you"
But just because what you mean is positive does not mean that it is bringing positivity into your life.  While this will come across as a fairly "woo woo" article, I strongly encourage you to take a look at the words you commonly say, and modify them to something more positive.  Even if you generally speak in a positive way see if their is anything you could take to a new level of positivity.
If you try this, and change your language for at least a month, I know you will see some interesting shifts. 

​The biggest shift for myself, was to only speak in a manner of what I do want.  So for example, instead of saying "I really hope it doesn't rain today"  I say "I want it to be sunny today."  Or "Don't do that / please stop doing that"  I will ask them to do what I want them to do "Will you please pick that up" or "Will you please be quiet."

This habit of speaking came about because of this book "A Complaint Free World."  I strongly recommend everyone to read this book, and do the no complaining challenge.  Holly cow!  It was hard for me.  Until starting this challenge I though it would be easy since I am such a positive person.  It took me 1 year 1 month and 22 days to successfully complete the challenge.  But I will tell you my life got a lot better right away because of it.  And the habit has stuck to speak in an affirmative way.  I still look at my language and how I can upgrade something that I say a lot every month.  And so I hope to inspire you to do the same, it might be tough, but it will be worth it.

Love,
Jessica

Hello!

How do you talk to and teach kids about money?  Well the bottom line is that they will learn what you are doing.  Whether you teach them or not you are their biggest role models and there's a 90% chance they will emulate you.  BUT having that free flowing conversation will certainly teach them some good habits that maybe are new to you too.

The first step is to confront your own stuff.  Look at all of your own beliefs, any side comments you say often, how you feel about money, like when you have to pay a large bill or receive a large amount of money, and  what do you want to pass on to your kids?

Getting clear and on the same page about what you do want to teach your kids about money is crucial.  This will guide the rest of your decisions.  Do you want to teach them that they will always have enough?  That they are perfectly capable to earn what they need for their own desires?  Do you want to teach them that how much they achieve is directly linked to how much they receive?  Do you want them to learn the benefit and discipline of saving up for something?  Or that knowledge is valuable?  Do you want to teach them that abundance is something to be grateful for?  Do you want to teach them that when one person wins we all win?

For example; if you will give them allowance, if they will have to earn the money though chores, good grades, reading books, or will they have to pay you as punishment when they behave poorly.  Is there a family fun jar?  Is there a star system?  Do you simply give money when every they need it?  All of this needs to be ironed out.  

I do think that giving an allowance is a good idea, with a catch.  It is discussed and they understand what that allowance is meant for.  If you give them an allowance then they should also be paying for some things with in reason.  I don't think it matters how much money you have, I do think its important for kids to have ownership and experience what it is like to want something and not have enough money for it unless they save; the experience of saving for something they really wanted and the joy of  the discipline of saving and finally getting it; conversely I think its also good to experience the pain of not being able to do or get something because they were not wise with their money.  That is usually a very tough lesson, that once experienced probably won't happen again.  This does require discipline on the parent's part.

Its also a wonderful experience for the child to work and earn their own money, whether they make something and sell it, mow lawns, babysit, deliver news papers, or even in this day you could teach your child to create an online business... 

I started working at 10.  I sold things from a catalog called Olympia Sales Catalog.  Of course I made mistakes, and I would only receive about $12 a month, which even at that time wasn't very much, but it was enough for me to buy the candy and stickers I wanted.   When I was 12 I began baby-siting.  And from seeing that $12 a month was not enough, I learned that lesson to save at a very early age.  I realized that I was going to want a lot more expensive things more and more.  So I created a savings plan, that I still use to this day.  Growing up my mom really couldn't afford an allowance.  I knew other kids got allowances, but for whatever reason I never felt bad or resentful that I didn't get one.  I knew how to make money, and I felt in control.  This was a wonderful lesson for me.

I knew of one guy that got an allowance plus was paid for his good grades.  Now I've heard through the grape vine that he is a horrible boss.  He did come from a better off family.  And I have no idea of what else is going on in his life.  We were not close.  But I bring this up for you to consider your values and what you would like to teach your children.  I do think an allowance is a good thing, not so much that they will be able to buy whatever they want, but enough so that they can do some of the things they want, then have that experience of choosing to save or the pain of not having enough to get what they want.  The paying for good grades?  That will depend on your values.  Do you want to teach them that there are rewards for doing what they should have been doing in the first place?  

I know of another family that pays their children per book they read and do a book report on.  I think this is wonderful and will be adopting this practice.  They choose to pay their children per book because they want to teach their children that knowledge is valuable.  The kids, in this situation are also going above and beyond what is required.  This is also teaching the kids public speaking skills, and comprehension and retention skills; all of which are invaluable.

Some parents teach their kids how to create their own businesses so that the child can provide for what they want.  I will also be implementing this practice.  It is so powerful to allow the child to dream AND create solutions to attain that dream.
Plus this is precious bonding time that you will be spending together working on their dreams.  They will learn that you are there to support them, but not hand whatever they want over to them.  You will also teach them that they are perfectly capable of getting what they want them selves.  This can be done with a really smart kid doing on line tutoring videos for other kids his age, a lemonade stand, bake sales, a dog walking business, buying things and re-selling them....  The ideas are limitless, let your child come up with the ideas.  I know you will be impressed.

Talking about a goal and the reward they will receive when they achieve their goal can also be very powerful.  The reward should be equivalent to the goal.  It could be something like a family trip, some special quality time, an experience that they really want to do with you that would maybe be a little more expensive that you would normally do, an instrument or tool that would even further fuel their hobbies.....

Whatever you choose to do with your child have a conversation and be consistent.  If you find that its not working or you want to change it, have another conversation before changing how things will go.  Its very important for the child not to be blindsided, and to experience consistency.

And ultimately it will come back to you.  Do you stress out about money?  Or are you relaxed about money?  Is money a taboo topic or something interesting to talk about?  You are the most important person in their life forever, they will ultimately emulate you.  So if you don't want them copying that bad habit, you have to change it.  If you want to inspire them to always reach for personal growth, when they see you making changes and the pay off you are experiencing they will also emulate that.

If you are interested in receiving a free consultation please contact me.  I am happy to provide tailored plans to talking to kids about money.

Creativelyjessica@gmail.com

Love, Jessica